Sunday, June 8, 2014

Soul is a Feather, Body is the Earth

I look at the P.E. teacher's raised arm, which is wearing dark blue Gore-Tex.
There is a lot of dust made from the 2nd graders who are playing soccer beside us.
It's the final performance test - the 50 meter dash.
I had been faster than my partner last time, and I wonder if I would be able to outrun her again.
Finally the teacher drops his arm and lets me and my friend run.
My feet push the ground and I swing my arms back and forth as fast as I can.
I feel a bit awkward because the flesh on my cheeks is pushed back by the air and makes me make a face.
The ground also feels like a great field of trampolines, so I cannot land my foot on the ground fast enough.

I try hard to ignore the soft jellylike feeling of the ground and look forward, and soon I don't even care about the way my arms and legs move.
I do not slow down at the finish line, and my feet make some scratching noise as they stop a little later.
I keep thinking, 'I did my best and I won't regret.' while I walk back to my teacher.
He talks to us rather simply.
"Both of you, 9.5".
Well, that's actually 0.3 seconds faster than before! Yay!
However, as I notice that my score did not change in spite of my effort, I wearily walk back to the spot I had started, kicking the ground hopelessly and making small clouds of dust.

About a week ago at P.E. class, everyone ran the 50 meter sprint as a performance test.
The boys could get a perfect score it their time was less than 8 seconds, and for the girls, the time limit was just 8.5 seconds.
The girls' score chart below is what I remember.

l         Time         l      Score      l
l   less than 8.5   l   20(perfect)  l
l        8.5-9.4      l        18          l
l       9.5-10.0      l         16         l
l  more than 10.0 l         14         l

I know it seems super easy for some people!
For me, the time limits are like enormous mountains that I can't reach the top of.
When I run the 50 meter dash, I become so nervous that I can feel my heart beating even before I start.
Sometimes when I feel like running, I just run on the streets.
I bet then I would be as fast as the best scoring boys in my class.
I don't understand why I become so clumsy, and my body becomes too lazy to move whenever I run the dash.
I guess I would have to train myself...though I don't like it the idea even as I write it here.
My soul is as light as feather, but my body is so heavy like...the Earth itself.
Someone please help me!